


saint, i'm a sinner. prize, i'm a winner

by liquidsky



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Friends With Benefits, Hand Jobs, M/M, Probably Too Many Feelings For Just One Hand Job
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-27
Updated: 2019-01-27
Packaged: 2019-10-17 10:47:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17558927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/liquidsky/pseuds/liquidsky
Summary: In which there's a hand job, feelings and a fair amount of life reflection.





	saint, i'm a sinner. prize, i'm a winner

Sometimes there’s nothing really to it – Dan loves the shape of Phil’s hands on his back and the bones of his elbows denting the mattress and the cadence of his voice when it wraps around his name. Maybe he shouldn’t, though it’s far too late for anything like that to be up for debate. 

What he wants now is the same thing he’s always wanted, always wants, nonstop, even when they’re barefoot and barefaced illuminated only by the cold light coming from the refrigerator, the one that makes Phil look sickly pale and too wide-eyed and aloof in a way that is not charming or remotely entertaining. He wants him all the same, so that’s why they’re here. 

His legs are wrapped tightly around Phil’s hips and he’s leaning forward like he’s going underwater against the crash of waves, seeking his lips and their softness and how wet they slide against his own. Phil’s hands are in his hair and on his shoulders and too softly on his cheeks and he thinks he’d be a fool to think this means something more than friendship but does it anyway. It’s the way things go – how warmth builds inside him, how he pulls Phil closer and closer and closer, hissing in pain or pleasure or both when his hair gets pulled on on the edge of too hard. 

The rhythm of their bodies is as familiar as anything – as the crease in their sofa and the weird hitch in Phil’s laughter and his long fingers and his freckled arms. He’s too familiar, probably, for this to have ever been a good idea, but Dan’s also startlingly aware of how he wouldn’t give up a single one of the many details he’s cataloged about Phil over the course of nine years, so the familiarity is good. He wouldn’t trade it. But again, he’s too familiar, and on a good day, Dan can guess just about every word that will come out of Phil’s mouth in both regular and reverse order. Maybe that’s why he’s never said it – he knows what Phil’s going to say, can even picture the downward slope of his mouth and the dullness in his eyes when he inevitably tells Dan that he doesn’t want him like that. Dan sometimes entertains the idea that their lives are far too intertwined for there to be a way in which Phil doesn’t want him, but Phil would’ve said it by now if he did, Dan thinks. 

“What are you thinking about?” Phil murmurs, and Dan chases his lips because he’s afraid this will be the time he gives it all up. Phil leans away from him, then back in to nudge his nose against the side of Dan’s face, a gesture that makes Dan’s breath catch. He closes his eyes. 

“‘m not thinking,” Dan says. He feels Phil sigh as it hits his cheek, and tightens his legs where they’re bracketing Phil’s hips, “Don’t stop, come on.” 

There’s a beat, a few seconds too long, but eventually Phil shifts forward again, pressing Dan more firmly against the mattress. He lowers his head to suck a bruise on the side of Dan’s neck and—here’s another thing, too intense for whatever this is. Dan’s awareness of the way everything between them has always been on the side of too much has never really been forgettable, much as he likes to pretend, so he rolls his hips up into Phil’s with enough enthusiasm to make up for how distracted and off-kilter he feels. He hears Phil’s soft intake of breath and the edges of the craving previously blurred by his uproarious feelings decidedly sharpen. Dan runs his hands up both sides of Phil’s back and pulls him in, groans loud in his throat when Phil’s hands travel downwards to settle firmly around his thighs. The familiarity of this routine has its upsides – Phil knows exactly how to touch Dan, his fingers eager but nonetheless deft as he shoves his hand between their bodies and rubs Dan’s cock through his pajamas. 

Dan wants it so much, and it's not surprising, but it's still a lot, and he spreads his legs so Phil has more space to move his hand against him, to pull his pants down and wrap his fingers around Dan's cock loosely, lightly teasing. Dan opens his eyes and Phil's brows are furrowed, his mouth parted. He looks focused and slightly surprised and Dan doesn't know how it's possible that he still looks like that, even now, even after years, but it makes his stomach clench and warmth curl around his limbs like fire, then Phil's tightening his grip, his touch sure as if Dan's an instrument he's never not known how to play. 

“That–” Dan starts, and his voice doesn't sound right at all, but Phil looks down at him with a look that tells him he already knows what Dan's going to say. 

“Feels good?” he asks, as he always does, and it's just another thing that Dan likes too much, because Phil already knows it does, his strokes long and sharp. Dan nods, wide-eyed in a way that can't be helped with how good Phil's touching him. 

Phil nods, too, dips down to nose against Dan's neck, “You look so good,” he says, and Dan's legs are starting to shake, he's pretty sure, and Phil speeds up his hand, “You always look like–” and pauses, assessing Dan and his wild hair and flushed face with a wondrous gaze. 

“Like what?” Dan breathes because this is not something he knows. This is new—brand new in the midst of all these familiar burning feelings and for maybe the first time in ages he has no idea what Phil's about to say. _Like you make me crazy_ , Dan thinks, _like I want you so bad I can barely breathe around it, like I'll do whatever you want me to and all you have to do is ask_. 

“Like you're surprised,” is what Phil says, and he touches his free hand to Dan's lips, spreading around spit and pulling them down lightly, “Like you can't believe I'm making you feel this good.” 

“You do,” Dan says, because Phil does, “You make me fucking crazy–” 

Phil's hands on him are too much already, Dan feels both like he's falling apart and being assembled together, every one of the little pieces that make him shifting into place under the sharp warmth in Phil's gaze. He shuts his eyes against it, hands twisting around the sheets, but– 

“Look at me,” Phil orders, and Dan does, because he meant it, he always means it – all Phil ever has to do is ask. Phil's watching him in a way that is far too knowing, and his touch is scorchingly hot where he's jerking Dan off. It's a lot, too much, and Dan's orgasm hits like the first second of a free fall, wild and overwhelming and too much as if he'll never catch his next breath. 

Phil kisses him through it, and Dan's hands loosen their grip on the sheets to grasp blindly at Phil, to touch his back and his shoulders and his hair and the corner of his mouth where it's starting to stretch around a smile. 

Dan catches his breath, and Phil's smiling, patient as he always is even as Dan can feel the hard line of his cock pressed against the side of thigh. He looks back at Phil, meets his eyes. 

“Surprised?” he asks, voice small. He thinks maybe he shouldn't ask – maybe whatever Phil meant was meant solely as dirty talk, and Dan should know better than to ask when his heart feels scraped raw and his body is still reeling from sensation. The thing is—the thing is that Dan's meeting Phil's eyes, and he's long since cataloged every possible infliction on Phil's voice, but not that one. He was surprised, and just maybe he doesn't know better after all. 

“You shouldn't be,” Phil says, and sometimes there's nothing really to it, except this time there is.

**Author's Note:**

> 8 years of being a full-time dnp fan and this is the first thing i've ever written about them. that it's just a random pwp written in the middle of the night is just so on brand for me, too. title is a line from miguel's song "sure thing". thank you for reading and have a lovely day! <3


End file.
